Therapy might not be needed- learning new tools as a parent could provide the resolution needed for your family
So many parents come to me telling me that they’re interested in joining our class, and also curious if they should find a therapist for their kid.
Often this is because their kid is particularly disruptive at home, has a hard time with transitions, and it feels like they’re holding everyone hostage with their behaviors!
Of course, there are times when this kind of behavior might require some sort of therapy for your kid.
Before you go that route, let me tell you what to try first.
I always suggest (and the kid-therapists who refer their clients to me do too!) trying a parent-led intervention first.
What’s a parent-led intervention?
Are you sure that you’re doing everything you can to improve things at home, without making your kid do anything new?
Do you have a clear understanding of their brain development and what’s an appropriate request at different ages?
Do you have a plan for discipline, consequences, and building your child’s frustration tolerance?
Are there times in the day when they can be independent, with no one watching, and make their own choices?
Do you actively help your kid problem-solve directly with their siblings?
Do you have a clear mission and value system, and focus only on what matters as a family? (In other words, do you have a plan not to nitpick and call your trickiest kid out on everything they do?)
These are all things we cover in the Raising Resilient Kids program. In addition to our chores survey, our screentime matrix, and our frustration tolerance wheel.
Without these pieces, child-based therapy won’t help your child in the long-term.
Picture your child in a toy house. You need to make sure that the roof isn’t leaky, that the carpet is soft, that there’s no drafts and that they have a cozy place to land. Once you’ve ensured that everything surrounding your kid is in order, then you’ll know you’ve done everything you can, and maybe therapy is the next step.
I can tell you for sure— most of the parents who discuss child therapy with me before the Raising Resilient Kids class don’t end up needing to send their kid to therapy after our class. The behaviors simply aren’t there anymore.
And some still do choose therapy after class! And when they do, they’re equipped with the knowledge and specificity that is so, so helpful to therapists wanting to support your kid.
The Raising Resilient Kids class is for you, the parent. Not because your kid’s behaviors aren’t challenging, but because you’ve got so, so much more power than you think to change things around at home.
