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Connected Parenting

I hope you enjoyed last week’s blog and were able to use the Cultivating Contributions Family Survey to start a discussion with your kids about their personal contribution desires.  I wanted to check in with you and see how things went. Were there any surprises when you asked your kids about their contributions? It’s incredible […]

June 22, 2023

The Best Time to Talk About Chores!

Parents often come to me telling me that.. … their kid is having a huge meltdown over something small… their child gets so upset when they lose a game and is inconsolable… their child has such big emotions coming home from school each day and that no amount of repeating back their emotions, guiding them […]

May 23, 2023

Is Your Child’s Brain Upstairs or Downstairs?

Is your child quick to shut down? When they’re reading, if they get a word wrong, do they close the book and stop reading? (do they even try with a word they don’t know?) After soccer, do they come home upset when they don’t get a turn? This is how so many of the parents […]

May 16, 2023

Does This Describe Your Child?

I want to give you some wisdom from my grandma. I had a dream about her recently. She died last year, and was a big influence on my life. She spoke many languages, Yiddish among them, and shared this Yiddish folktale with me. She especially shared it right after I had my baby, when I […]

May 9, 2023

A Yiddish Folktale

I was talking to parents last week about their 11-year-old who seems to lack motivation in school and at home. He’ll start his homework and leave it after a few questions. Or, he’ll put off writing a paper until the very last minute, even though his mom has been bugging him to write the darn […]

May 3, 2023

If Your Child Lacks Initiative…

frustration tolerance diagram

You are in the kitchen, and your spouse, who is a better chef than you are, is watching you make dinner. You cut the onions, and your spouse comes behind you and re-cuts parts of the onions to be smaller. You grab a spatula, and your spouse tells you “it’ll be easier for you to […]

May 2, 2023

Picture This…

This is true for our kids. Whoever we decide they are, is who they will be. What does this have to do with helping and resilience?  Last week, we talked about pausing before correcting/helping your child in order for you to see if your help is necessary.  (you can find that information here.) We know […]

April 25, 2023

“I Am as I Am seen”

I Am As I Am Seen

Let’s talk about tests.  We want our kids to do well on tests.  Yesterday, I had two conversations that I didn’t think were related, but were.  One was with a mother who has a son in third grade and test prep has been coming up in his school. He goes to a really high-performing school […]

December 15, 2022

The Only Test That Matters

[Read a previous post on: Turning Reluctant Readers into Resilient Readers] This is me as a kid. And, I have a secret to tell you… I was a bad student. I was the kind of student who constantly got calls home with well-meaning declarations from teachers: “she has much potential” but “she just needs to […]

September 12, 2022

How your child feels when school is hard…

[Read a similar post on: Normalizing Mistakes] The other day, a parent said to me “I know it’s my fault that my daughter is such a perfectionist.” I could tell that she was feeling so guilty. Like all of us feel when we see characteristics we don’t love in ourselves show up in the tiny humans […]

September 6, 2022

It’s my fault my child is a perfectionist

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